PLEASE read any help appreciated?

Hi i have some serious anger and hate issues infact its gotten so much that my chest hurts constantly. I came here to america in 2nd grade and went to school in the south I was originally from (arab country) ever since then I always felt like I was looked down upon and usually treated badly made fun off and even looked down upon by teachers it got bad in middle school but real bad in high school. I was treated real badly like humiliated on daily basis I mean throw into lockers shoes thrown at me in the locker room had my back pack put in a toilet with poop in there in the middle of jogging in gym i would have been slapped in the face by some one, made fun of in large groups. repeatedly made fun off hared in all ways punched in back of neck on bus treated like in worse manners i didnt have any friends I felt worthless and like second cl trash, looked down upon that feeling is terribe if you felt it, was crying on the inside and hated evangelicals for their trash and hypocricy in their manipulated religion which any one in right mind can disprove and for listening to trash in church about my people being bad ppl and implementing on me and listening to trash zionist media here in USA about my people I hated southerners especially for stupidness, backwardness and racists, i cant say americans because I dont like to put all americans like this bc i know there are good ones. i hated everyone and everything even myself for taking crap so long i contemplated going back but I grow up here unfortunately but i am still thinking about going back after college either way after high school and I felt that My feelings would go away but infact It did for a little bit i majored in premed so i can be a doctor and get respect and more importantly to help ppl but feelings came back alot more stronger in past few yrs with more vigor my chest hurts constantly I sleep alot so i dont think about it and my productivity is low i dropped out this semester in college because of this my hatred is at a very high level and anger. I want to move on but I cant and I dont know what to do I see people from high school and i just cant look at them bc of humiliation or I look at them and cough to show them that I didnt like them or appreciate them which I really dont respect them. I want to move on with my life but I cant i tried forgiving them but i cant I just wanna take action in a way to restore my self and move on I CANT LIVE LIKE THIS in hell people i talk to myself and laugh to myself and think i am crazy, what do I do i appreciate any help if possible from anyone and I am sorry for venting or making you read all of this please dont ridicule or make fun bc itll be worthless so keep it to yourself.